Wings, the blizzard and you tube

"Me and Tony are going to wings, I was just calling to see what you and Keely were doing later." Mozz said when he called me in the middle of the afternoon on Saturday. The day before my birthday. The day in which I had already went to lunch with my parents at the very decadent Yesterdays and also seen a movie.

The movie was Stranger than Fiction. The animation in it reminded me a lot of HHGTTG. While I would not recognize their names if I saw them, I would not be surprised if the animators at least a few of them were the same.

Mozz didn't for several minutes directly invite me out to eat. As of late I've been living life as a vampire and without direct invitation I will not assume that I am welcome anywhere. It took several more times of him saying "Tony and I are getting wings and I wondered what you were doing later," until he modified it to include "So if you wanted to come, that would be cool."

In the business world, the one that is mostly figurative and evolved from buzzwords and rumors from Japan it is a deadly sin for one to "ASSUME." I have as of late been inducted into that world in the same way I was not inducted into the Thespian Society in high school. It is only deep seated rage and coincidence that I mention that here in a post in which I am also discussing Mozz whom if memory serves correctly did get inducted to the Thespian Society. I need to end this line of discussion right now, because it is several blogs of a discussion I don't feel like covering it this morning.

Right now it is 5:00am on a Tuesday. Three days after these events took place. I probably wouldn't be writing about it at all except I was threatened. Tony at some point in the evening said that I should, no wait he said "That had better go in the Blog!" And since I don't remember exactly what he was talking about I am trying to remember the entire evening the best that I can.

This is going to be complicated. Mozz is staying at Tony's house. Tony owns this house but has not yet moved in. It's a nice house in a suburbia that seems ancient yet has defied the pattern of most, which quickly fall into the habit of becoming white trash neighborhoods or ghettos. It has kept it's secluded innocence, and before Tony took us over to see it, I had not known the area existed. This is partly because I do not entirely believe that anything exists outside of my personal experience but mostly because it's not on the way to anywhere I've been. It's right next to some places I always go, but it's not something you can drive through to get there. (At this point any one who hasn't been there and can not tolerate my non-descriptive writing, will begin to focus their browsers elsewhere.) Tony lives in an apartment. Mozz was waiting for Tony to drop by, then they were going for wings. They didn't know if they were going to Wings ETC or Hooters. When Tony arrived, Mozz was going to call us.

We waited and watched TV. We laid in bed and watched TV. We waited and got hungry. We waited and got tired. We waited and got mildly irritated. Then the phone rang. It was Mozz. Tony had made it and they wanted us to come over there to Tony's house. I had an overwhelming feeling that everything was going to be alright.

The drive from Tony's house to my house and vice versa (but not a round trip) is roughly four miles. Not very far at all. The roads were clear because the only snowfall we'd seen had melted or blown away. The weathermen were all, as per usual, fearing for their lives due to the constant lies they had been spinning. Global warming was kicking their ass.

When we got to Tony's house he was playing with his phone on his new couch in his newly painted front room of his newly purchased home. Sitting next to him was his old friend Mozz who was watching the new TV I gave them that was really old. In reference to which Mozz always said "That TV sucks, dude." Which makes me feel real good that I did not ask that they pay for it. It is common I have come to believe, with friends, that you give each other gifts that are either really cool or maddeningly of poor quality for the simple fact that these items hold those very attributes. Collectively the core of my giving has been I feel of the later. Am I a lesser friend because of this? Maybe not due to the quantity of my generosity. Or if you take into consideration the original value of the items that I gave long after their prime? On the other hand I have been nearly completely out of contact with my friends off and on for several years and the giving of things has been limited.

More importantly than all of that I may forever have to rename Tony; Envy. On more than one occasion he has possessed items, opportunities and experiences; that have caused me to sin. The sin being envy. The highest of these in my current mindset is his new cell phone. He now has a Motorola Q. When my Samsung 650a stopped doing anything, I looked into getting a new phone. That was the one I wanted more than anything. That was the one that cost more than some vehicles I have owned. It was so cool to hold his phone that I nearly cried. I wanted to take it with me and fondle it until it's battery died, then plug it into an A/C adapter/charger and continue the fondling it until I died. At some later point (perhaps after I own my own) I may post a review of it. I could tell it had some quirks. None of the quirks however outweighed it's coolness.

After sharing ring tones and hearing that my favorite Cake song was what he heard when I called him (however seldom that was) we all got into the Jimmy and went to Wings Etc. In my head this place of culinary limitted-ness is a fictional halfway point between my house and Tony's. I'm not squabbling over the back tracking because I understand how much fun we had car pooling.

I don't know why people assume or think that I am a bad driver. Have I had accidents? Have I had traffic violations? Have I fallen asleep at the wheel? Have I driven when I've perhaps been over the legal limit? I would say tentatively, yes but more like maybe once or twice and it's nothing I'm proud of. However on all of those occasions (for the most part) I was alone. No one witnessed them, yet as we begin our journey towards a legendary evening Mozz took the time to point out that while he was about to do it currently he had also in the past critiqued my driving skills (in a way that was not at all complaining). The better word is "Damned" my driving skills. Suddenly I was in the middle of a caucus in which all agreed I may have well been born an Asian woman past her prime and being less than four feet tall, the way I command control of an automobile.

[I don't know why I wrote that, no one said anything like that, and it's racist and prejudiced against Asians (that I find attractive and way to intelligent to ever communicate with, without being terribly embarrassed by my un-special American-ness) the elderly (which I am ever moving forward to become) and the height challenged (which as Randy Newman says "Got no reason to live.")]

Little to say we made it to the dinning experiance without complication.

Wings Etc. is a sports bar with family dinning. (Due to Indiana or St Joe Coutny laws there is no smoking in bars unless they are made completley seperate from dinning areas via walls and doors.) They have wings but they also have all the usual crap you'd find at a burger and beer place. Nothing too fancy. No paper towel or peanuts at the table or on the floor. Everyone but Keely got at least some portion of their meal made from the tiny wings of chickens. We had a great time and no time was greater than when I took out my new toy and took an 8mp picture of Mozz at about 2.5 inches away. I like Macro pictures. So then when you see the picture in all it's greatness you are very near to seeing the actual Mozzucules that make up a Mozz. Seeing ones self under such a microscope is a difficult thing to endure. There is no where to hide that close and detailed.

Oh there was one better moment, and that was when Mozz attempted to eat the coleslaw Tony got with his meal. This was challenge because they didn't supply any of us with silverware. We did have some paper plates and Mozz had an idea. My personal idea was to use my camera to record the event as the first post millennium Druidic-video to be produced. The second idea I had was to use the windows movie maker to turn it into a youtube classic.

When we left Wings Etc. the weathermen had won. My car was under six inches of snow and the large pieces of frozen water molecules were gently floating down in a sea of impaired vision. I went out to warm up and clean off the car while Mozz had a smoke and everyone hung out around him. Even at this point of life with our heavy knowledge of how Mozz will die long before any of us, he still emanates a level of cool to on lookers.

What doesn't emulate a level of cool is the no nonsense business side of Mozz we got to experience when we took him to Meijer to face out his product. Was he over the legal limit? No one really knows, we might have been able to tell by the amount of complaining he was doing because he never complains* and that would be a good measuring tool.

We are some of the best/worst friends. I really don't know which way to judge us, but we seem to like to gang up and frustrate each other on occasion and to no end. Normally it's when one of us is required to something serious. After he went behind the curtain of the Meijer gateway from selling space to storage space we felt ditched for several minutes until Mozz called on his cell phone from several rows away.

He was being forced to use a display stand that was not his own to support more product that it was built for all for capatalistic politics. Valentines day was coming and his Little Debbie supplies needed to be in a visible location for the early morning Sunday crowd. We stood there next to him and judged his company against his competitors and interrogated him about the methods in which he made money. Tony tried relentlessly to buy from Mozz instead of Meijer but there was some sort of catch 22 that could not be broken. Mozz only sells the treat that Tony likes to Meijer. Mozz didn't want Tony to have to buy the treat, he would give the treat to Tony. The only problem was that Mozz didn't have any extra or available to give him. So to recap Tony wanted to buy something that Mozz wouldn't let him and equally couldn't get for him or give to him. The only solution was that Tony, in order to have his chocolaty goodness available to him right now, he had to buy it from Meijer.

When that ordeal was complete, we took them back to Tony's house where the blizzard had full-on shut down most roads and people forgot how to drive completely. There were comments made on how my driving had improved the worse the roads became. I don't know if that was some kind of insult or weird coincidence.

When I got home I found out that my camera is a communist. It takes movies in the *.mov format known mostly as the quicktime format that is more commonly associated with the Mac computers. Windows movie maker denies that it's the kind of file it wants to associate with. I had to download a video converter. When I did the quality went to hell and I was pissed. So now I have gone on to stage two or plan B, which ever you prefer and have uploaded the mov file to jumpcut.com. there I hope to be able to edit it and snap it up a little then be able to post the finished project on youtube.com where we will all be come famous.


*At some point Mozz said durring dinner that he never complains. Twice this year since I've been hanging out with Mozz I've seen this look in his eyes like I've hurt his feelings. I never want to hurt anyone's feelings (which makes me screwed as a manager). It saddens me when I see that look. I also get a little scared because it's just a step to left for full on rage. Right here is offended and over there is kick your ass, which way do you want to take a walk? Tony heard this and began to laugh uncontrollably. We determined that Mozz doesn't ever complain. He shares his unbiased opinions that normally sway to the negative, but not because of him, because the truth is most things on a whole suck.